Plane crashes. To soothe and distract the passengers, the captain sends in the salon stewardess with an order to show passengers a striptease. She goes to the salon and said:
- Right now, I'll take off my skirt, and we fall off the right wing. And when unbutton her blouse, we lose touch left wing ...
She undresses, wings torn off, the plane falls. Surviving passenger is selected from the wreckage, and saw a stewardess, she yells:
- And you yourself damn jokes and your goddamned!
Private Shaw was called to the carpet to the head.
- You have something to say before I pasturage you from the army? - Finished dressing officer.
- How about my promotion, sir?
The soldier turned over a cup upside down and turns to the corporal:
- Of this mug to drink can - she has the upper hand soldered! Cpl long spit cup, then said:
- Yes, she and the bottom, no!
Floating ocean liner. In the wardroom one of the passengers entertained. The whole team, and even the captain's parrot, sitting on a perch watching with interest the tricks. Magician has all the empty blanket. And suddenly pulls out from under him in an aquarium with fish. All applaud. Parrot flapping wings of delight. Magician covers the aquarium cover, then pulls off his - Aquarium disappeared. At this time the ship hits the mine. Explosion! The boat sank. The waves only a fragment of the mast, on which sits a parrot. He looks closely at the water and says: "I wonder what he will tell us more?"
- Tell me, what, Rabinowitz died?
- That's right, I see it in the coffin lay.
When the Democrats come to power, they are preserved, and the Conservatives, losing power, democratized, and everything starts all over again ...
- Young people - the doctor said the patient - you have a lung full of smoke. It seems that you are sleeping with open window!
- What is the difference from a true gentleman, a gentleman?
- The gentleman opened the door to the bathroom and saw there a naked girl, hastily shut the door and shouted: "Excuse me, mademoiselle!" A true gentleman, happy examined the girl, said: "Excuse me, sir!" and slowly closes the door.
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