Orderly in the company sits on the bedside table and read an interesting detective story. In the arrangement of a company comes to the regimental commander and did not hear any commands. The orderly, enthusiastic reading, it does not notice. The commander came up to him and asked:
- You orderly?
- I, - says the man and continued to read.
- It is well settled!
- Who are you? - Not looking up from the book.
- The commander of the regiment!
- Also well settled!
At the ball, a young artillery officer dances with a charming young beauty.
- Tell me, Lieutenant, and how do the guns?
- Oh, mademoiselle, is very simple - responsible officer - comes hole and sweating copper.
funny joke of the day
Colonel Graves, known for its captiousness, met with all the passion to the external form, we construct a soldier, but was stopped by a sergeant, who said that the colonel's feet wearing shoes of different style and color.
- Sir, - said the sergeant embarrassed - dare to report that one of your leg black boots, and the other brown. Maybe you better go home first boots before inspecting the soldiers.
- I give it? - Replied the colonel. - Houses too shoes in different colors.
The colonel invited the lieutenant for his birthday, but warned him not to put it. Here they all sat down at the table. Enter the hostess with a candle in her hand and says: Not enough candlesticks. I do not know where to insert the twelfth candle ... The Colonel jumped up, knocking over a chair and shouted: Shut up, lieutenant!
- What are the similarities between the breasts and a toy railroad?
- And then, and another designed for children, but adults are very fond of his uncle in their play.
When checking duty sentry duty on the part asked him:
- Do you live ammunition?
- Yes, sir.
- Give them to me ... So, that's all? More than you have nothing left?
- Only one bullet, sir.
- Give it to me.
- I can not, sir. I need it in case you do not return the rest to me.
joke bumper stickers
- Girl! What are you doing tonight?
One big, fat woman came into a crowded train and, not finding space, went to the smoker. There she sat on the empty seat without attracting much attention, because the men were busy around smoking and reading newspapers. Her neighbor, blowing smoke, solving crossword puzzles.
- Um ... - She said, looking at him - what I was stupid, assuming that there exists at least one gentleman ... The neighbor looked up from a crossword puzzle:
- Pardon, Madame - "he stammered, - I do not want a cigar?
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