General held a meeting with the officers. One lieutenant his comments inserted where necessary and should not be disrupting the meeting.
- Lieutenant, - restrained the general said, - you know more about military life, if you keep your ears open and mouth shut!
- I do not think that behaving in such a way, you can attain the title of your - replied the young officer.
- Before I was not, - said the commander, - and before your next rank - captain may be ...
joke of the day one liner
The sergeant retired stops in a small provincial hotel. And only began to pack to sleep, when suddenly hears in the room to the left of a hysterical female voice:
- Wait ... wait ... not so fast! At the same time in the room right of it is heard the cry of another woman:
- Faster ... faster ... I beg you! Blood from non-commissioned officer begins to boil, he jumped out of bed and hitting the wall of one, then another room, shouting:
- Listen to my command, damn it! One-two! One-two! One-two! ..
At rehearsal director appeals to the young actress:
- I'm afraid, in the air so you can not dress how to play their role.
- But why?
- You see, in the decisive stage of your fiance tells you: "Honey, do you want from me something to hide." Agree, with the toilet phrase sounds like a joke.
joke short stories
Two lieutenant walking on the street. They see in front of a girl with a cute butt. Overtake, look into the face of disappointment and say:
- Girl if you were just as beautiful in front as behind, we would have kissed you.
- Kiss to where I am beautiful!
- Waiter, I fly in my soup!
- And you that ordered a cockroach?
joke of the day one liners
- The publisher of the newspaper in our city refuses to publish obituaries of the deceased, who were not his subscribers.
- What he says?
- He says that these people are for him at all or when it is not lived.
The next day after a concert in a small American town of the famous violinist rushed to a local newspaper and anger demanded editor.
- I thrice declared your goof-reporter that I play the violin of the great Stradivari! And in the newspaper about this word!
- If your master Stradivari wants to advertise their products, let him pay ten dollars for a line!
next 135 136 137 138 139