My husband went on business trips. And to Sarah immediately came to a lover. Only the sections and assembled into bed, as it returned Chaim. Sarah, not knowing where to hide Abraham finally says to him, that stood on the table and twist the bulb.
- I must say that you are an electrician. Opens the door, the husband comes. He looked at the "electrician".
- And who is this? - He asks.
- Yes fitter, - says Sarah.
- Why naked?
- Do not you feel, what we have heat?
- Yes, but look: he is ...
- Of course it will be - he's energized!
In school, military intelligence instructor taught the students that no lock can not be a barrier for an experienced scout, and has demonstrated an excellent ability to open any locks and bolts. He then asked the students if there is to it matters. The question was one:
- Sir, what you were doing before the army?
The judge said:
- According to your complaint, the defendant said that you fool. This is the honest truth?
- Then what are you complaining? The night was dark. The guard wanted to smoke.
- Hey, Mac! - He shouted, as he thought of his friend, held near the post. _ Do you have any cigarettes? Then he considered what he called the general.
- Excuse me, sir! - He shouted and took a rack of "attention".
- At ease, soldier, - he gave the command, General. - And I think you are lucky that I did not lieutenant!
Moishe comes to Abram:
- Listen, Abram, what should I do? My son the day before yesterday dropped everything and went to Jerusalem to become a Christian.
- It's incredible! My son, too, the day before yesterday dropped everything and went to Jerusalem to become a Christian. Let's talk it over with the rabbi ... And they went together to the rabbi ...
- Rabbi, what shall we do ...?
- It's incredible! But my son dropped everything and went to Jerusalem to become a Christian. We must pray ... After two days of prayer the heavens opened and there is God.
- What do you want from me, Rabbi?
- What can we do? Our children are moving away from the faith of Israel in Jerusalem, to become Christians ...
- It's unbelievable, but my son ...
jokes of the day one liners
- Monsieur, I've already brought the menu?
- If yes, then I had already eaten.
In the Budapest Zoo. Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
Lesson of English literature. The teacher asked an essay on the free theme. He walks between the rows and looks, as someone wrote. Losers Johnny sitting on the last row, grimly staring at the ceiling, in the notebook - empty.
- What are you, Johnny? Do not know what to write?
- No, ma'am ...
- Well, I'll help you. Write about God, our Queen, add a bit of sex and mystery and everything would be OK!
- Thank you, ma'am, I'll do ... The teacher checks the work. In the notebook Johnny just one phrase: "Oh, my God, - said the queen - I'm pregnant again, and we know from whom!"
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