- I think, must be removed from our hospital nurse, Jane, - said the commander of his deputy.
- We have dramatically increased the number of patients.
After the lesson of practical driving in a driving school instructor tells the students:
- You need to learn better control of the machine. Today you have downed ten pedestrians.
- Ten? And how many want to get right?
The Ministry of Defense set a new supercomputer. Arrives with a very important test of the general and he certainly demonstrated this miracle of technology. After all the demonstrations, the general wanted to set myself a computer question:
- Should we attack or retreat? Computer long pondered and finally issued a response to the display:
After correcting the computer program thought even longer, and finally once again gave the answer:
- Yes, sir!
- Quite so!
jokes of the day one liners
A priest meets with the rabbi and says:
- Today I had a strange dream. It was as if I was in a Jewish paradise. And it's so dirty, smelly and running!
- And me, - says the rabbi, - dream as if I was in a Christian paradise. And it's so clean, light, sheer fragrance - and not a soul!
At the barber:
- Say that I have already shaved? Something I do not remember your face ...
- You see, it was during this time has fully healed.
- I tell you frankly, my friend, I never doubted the loyalty of his wife, while we in New York he moved to Chicago.
- What's the matter?
- I noticed that the milk gives the same milkman as in New York.
In one English college students were invited for a very short story. Subject any, but there are four necessary conditions: The essay should be made to the Queen; mentioned God, To make it a little sex, to attend a secret. The first prize was awarded to a student who has fulfilled all the conditions pertinent story in one sentence: "Oh my God, -" cried the Queen - I'm pregnant and not know from whom! ".
next 147 148 149 150 151