Komandirovochniy wants to buy his wife a gift bra. The seller wants to know the size:
- Well, if only in form, that is: peach, apple, small Dynko?
- Ears spaniel ...
One military chef asked how the Army prepares a dish of finely chopped meat rabbit.
- In normal proportions, - answered the cook, - a rabbit - one horse.
Ensign built the company.
- Check the status of footwear. Right foot - up! All raise the right leg, a soldier mistakenly raised his left. Ensign notices in the ranks of the double gap:
- Who's that raised both legs?
Sergeant Miller scolding recruits:
- Just look at himself: shoes not been cleaned, her hair is not combed, ties wrinkled. And now, if any country has suddenly declared war on us?
The rabbi read a sermon in the synagogue:
- Jews! We, as no other nation should be very friendly with each other, faithfully honor their obligations to the family. Let fall the wrath of Moses to the Jews, visiting brothels! At this time a cry of:
- Well, finally remembered where I left my galoshes!
- Tell me, doctor, is it really so bad to drink a glass before each meal?
- No, but do not eat too often.
We recommend a simple way out of a delicate situation. Faced with the lady in the evening, you offer her lunch together. If she agrees, ask another question:
- You call or push?
In the city buses on the driver's head is always hanging ad. In Germany: "It is strictly forbidden to talk to the driver." In England: "It is better not to talk to the driver." In Israel: "There is no interest in talking with the driver." In Italy: "It is forbidden to respond to the driver."
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