The company commander was given a talking to the soldiers:
- You bastards! Tells me, an intelligent man part attributed to you in plain language for you, why I have headache and, consequently, suffer my whole family ...
Newfound military police was asked what he feels when the rank and file call him "pig".
- It does not bother me, - he said. - I can not get used to what they call me "sir."
On the treadmill group of soldiers get ready to run and was waiting when the sergeant will start from the starting pistol. Women watching these competitions, "said her friend:
- Look at these unfortunate soldiers: they have to do everything at gunpoint.
- Does anyone have complaints about the uniforms? - Asked the sergeant recruits.
- My trousers are not all right - complained one recruit.
- I see that with the trousers you are all well, - calmed him sergeant.
- Maybe so, but they only shake my armpits.
- It's a pity that your husband passed away so early ... He could still live and live ...
- Yes, drugs were still three weeks ...
- Sarah, what are your legs curves!
- Well, and that the curves, but hairy!
Two gentlemen speak after a dinner party:
- Tell me, sir, why today during lunch you ever kissed the hand of the lady that was sitting on your left?
- You see, sir, I forgot to put a napkin.
They talk to two Englishmen.
- Mr. Brown, what do you like horses raven or apples?
- When I ride on black, I like the raven, but if I ride horses in some of the apples I like apples.
- Mr. Brown, and what do you like blondes or brunettes women?
- When I ... - Thank you Mr Brown.
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