Private infantryman turned to the commander to provide him with a three-day vacation.
- Why do you?
- My wife received the rank of sergeant, and I want to go to her.
- This is my dream, sir, fuck a sergeant.
Classes at the artillery school. The officer explained that the projectile flies down a steep arc.
- And if the gun sideways to put the projectile flies around the corner? - Ask soldiers.
Thinking the officer replied:
- Clearly. But our soldiers from around a corner to shoot will not
One soldier described the heat, standing on the spot exercises:
- It was so hot that the eagles on his epaulettes colonel turned into fried chicken.
"That is why the colonel called chickens," - he thought one of the listeners.
Sinks ship. The Englishman, with a pipe in his mouth, turns to the captain:
- Sir, some of the boats for smokers?
Saloon in the Wild West. Bartender Joe complains:
- This mountain, died yesterday, one of our regular customers. Remarkable cowboy! Every day he drank with us for thirty cups of beer and two liters of whiskey.
- And why did he die?
- I have no idea.
The two agree to meet.
- Where you want.
- At what time?
- Okay. Only a very beg you: do not be late!
There is a guy in a cemetery at night, terrified. All of a sudden it catches up with another, all such solid in the suit. First he says:
- Man, let's go together. And then the terrible like that, you know, these superstitions ... dead ... I'm afraid of them.
- Why should we be afraid?
Comes deaf Lord home. Taking off his coat in the Lord, the sender mutters under his nose:
- The old drunkard! Again the club nazyuzyukalsya! And again to the dancers molested, but did not work, huh?
- You are mistaken, James! - Interrupts his Lord - Just went to town to buy new hearing aids ...
next 80 81 82 83 84